Never been so motivated to see nether regions in all my life!

I'm convinced that pregnancy is simply a bunch of worrying and nervousness that is punctuated by momentous and touching, heart-felt moments. I work in a field where I see babies born with serious complications and I think this plays into my nearly constant state of worry.

When I went in for my viability ultrasound so long ago it seems, it was to make sure there was truly a baby inside. I had been spotting the day before which made me think I was having a miscarriage. And then we saw a little flicker of a heart beat and my world was turned upside down. A couple of months ago we went in for another ultrasound just to help rule out any 1st trimester genetic anomalies and again I sat there petrified that perhaps something would be amiss. And we saw a little half sea monkey/half human moving around, with a nose and hands (!) and again, we were speechless.

Yesterday was the "big" ultrasound where they make sure that the baby doesn't have any major complications. They check for everything: heart, lungs, amniotic fluid, fetal anomalies, and as I sat there in the waiting room, my hands were clammy and my heart nearly stopped. I hadn't for certain felt the baby move yet and I was hoping that everything was normal.

When the tech started the ultrasound, there the little kiddo was! moving around and so big! It took about 30 minutes for the tech to check everything and Baby was 100% normal. We told her we wanted to know the sex of the baby and she swung her little ultrasound wand around and said without missing a beat,

"Looks like you guys are having a GIRL!"

And then the room went black. And my heart grew 10 times bigger and the tears started to come. "Baby" isn't just a "baby" anymore. It took me a good 10-20 minutes to really grasp what she said because i was CERTAIN we were having a boy. I argued with the tech, "Now are you SURE? Like POSITIVELY? Like, WITHOUT A DOUBT THIS IS A GIRL?" while Pocket sat in the corner gloating over his victory. And yes, without a shadow of a doubt, we are having a little girl. and you know what? That afternoon, Pocket had his had on my stomach and she kicked. And I felt it. And he felt it. And everything was perfect.

I can't wait to meet you, kiddo.

Me. Age 2.